Thursday, December 09, 2021

November 2021

November started off a bit rough but ended on a fun and high note. We did a lot of traveling and this month flew by fast.

It was a big birthday month for our family. Reilly turned 25 and Kameron turned 21! How are my babies this old? We had a family birthday dinner for Reilly the night that she and Hunter got back from Utah. She wanted a Yellowstone viewing party. She requested that a table be set up in the living room so that we could watch the season premier. Bryn definitely needed some earmuffs and a blindfold for most of it and she was good to oblige. Reilly requested Broccoli Divan for dinner, limonata pellegrino to drink, and homemade cherry pie with ice cream for her birthday dessert. No problemo!


We had a fun night celebrating her and just relaxing and hanging out together after getting back from Utah. She wanted as her gift a family night at the arcade. She is a kid who would always rather have *experiences* rather than gifts.

Two days later Kameron turned 21 and we celebrated him from afar. We sent him two care packages and ordered him a birthday cake (Red Velvet) from the bakery at the Hy-Vee grocery store in his little town and he was able to pick it up on his birthday.

He also got to spend the day with his district. He was able to go out to lunch with all of them at Chipotle so that was extra fun too. It was nice that he could shake up his routine a bit on his birthday!


We talked to him on his birthday too which was nice! That week was a phone call bonanza! We talked to him as a family on his regular Monday night phone call, then again on Reilly's birthday, and yet again on his birthday! It was great!


The next night I was texted this picture from a branch member who took Kam out for a belated birthday dinner! Kam in a sombrero. Historic!! I love it! He hates when restaurants sing happy birthday to him and *usually* refuses to allow it. Looks like he really is a new man! LOL.

I took down the Halloween decorations and decorated for Christmas. Thanksgiving is wonderful but I'm ready for some Christmas cheer. I used to be such a purist. No Christmas until after Thanksgiving. Kameron even argued the validity of this very point with someone in his branch about how his family wants Thanksgiving to get its due and then that night we told him that we had already decorated for Christmas. Oops!


Bryn had a few glorious weeks of volleyball which she absolutely LOVED and then she fell down in the carpool lane. She tripped on her friend's backpack and sprained her wrist and thus ended her illustrious volleyball season. I didn't even get one picture of her playing! Poor kid. She got her wrist X-rayed and ended up in a splint for a couple of weeks. Luckily she could still somewhat play the piano and cello in her splint. She has a Christmas piano recital and a Christmas orchestra concert coming up.


Waiting for her wrist x-ray.

Ailey and Bryn had parent/teacher conferences. All were virtual. Now that we don't have kids in elementary school anymore I am all for virtual parent/teacher conferences. I hope we never go back. LOL. Both girls are doing well in school and are enjoyable to have in class. Good.

After Bryn got her cold... Ailey got it. Neither one had COVID. Thank goodness. But a lot of people we know got it this month. It seems that most of our unvaccinated friends all got COVID this month and some were really sick...even the teenagers. Two of our friends' kids were hospitalized. Several of our vaccinated friends had breakthrough cases but didn't get as sick. I tried to see if I could get my booster shot before we headed out of town for Thanksgiving but our delightful state of Washington wasn't allowing it for the average person yet... even though all of my in-laws and Kirk and Meki were able to get theirs in Utah last month. It is SO FRUSTRATING. Shame on you Washington State and Governor Inslee.

We want to do some bathroom updates in the next few weeks. We had someone come in and give us a bid and it was laughable. Tyler decided that he will do it all himself! It will be nice to get that done and hopefully get our family room flooring done too before New Years. All of the unexpected travel this month ate up any free time for big home projects. Tyler did a few little projects: a new faucet for the kitchen sink, new door bell, a new overhead light in the family room, and a new plug/wiring system for the garage. Those little things made us both incredibly happy! And should keep our garage from starting on fire! Always a good thing!


As I stated in a previous post, Midtown Market had their big holiday open house while we were in Utah. They had it a week earlier this year and I think that it made an incredible difference. So while it was stressful trying to get everything done before I flew to Utah... I was there all day the day before we left... It turned out to be a great idea and a great success! I sold twice as much merchandise in November this year. Sales were really wonderful with the Holiday Open House...Black Friday... Small Business Saturday...and a Customer Appreciation Day too. I am so pleased with how it all turned out even though it kept me busy and I had to make a few extra trips to Coeur d' Alene to restock my booth. It has been a fun month with awesome sales totals!!
 
Ailey has been super busy this month with dance team practices. Competition season starts in December and so does basketball season. The dance team is also doing a dance camp next month for elementary age kids. Ailey is in charge of planning that. Then Rubber Chicken is in January and Ailey will once again be the chicken. She is thrilled! LOL. She has also been busy applying to colleges and helping Kam apply too. That has been a bit stressful! 

Ailey is a typical high school senior who is very ready to go to college. She is never home and when she is she is not the most...how shall I say it...friendly. LOL. I know that each kid goes through this but it doesn't get any easier. The power struggles really suck. Ailey got her car taken away from her for a few days this month. Tyler got fed up with her and literally went to the high school and removed it from the parking lot in the middle of the school day. Having a car is a privilege around here not a right. She had to earn it back which she did. 17 is precious!

Ailey was also potentially exposed to COVID from a girl on the dance team (along with the rest of the team) and it caused quite a ruckus with the parents. The sick COVID positive girl kept coming to practice! WTH? Luckily no one else on the dance team tested positive. Good grief. Stay home if you are sick!

It's been a wonderfully social month for our family! Yay for friends and fun times! We never see much of Ailey these days and Bryn is getting busier and busier with her friend group. I've had some very fun friend gatherings this month that were MUCH needed. Oh the joys of a girls night! I don't care if it's out doing something or hanging out as a group at one of our houses. Just the joy of all of us being together! I had several of those this month!! There is nothing better than talking late into the night with a big group of your closest friends!! Happiness!

I got to visit with several of my good friends from my vintage world. I have missed them! Most of us are in stores or own stores now so we don't see each other as often as we used to. It's been so nice to catch up with a lot of them. One afternoon Tyler and I drove down to my friend Teresa's store in Rockford, WA. It is gorgeous! It is one of my very favorite places. We were going to do a little early Christmas shopping. I was able to have a really good visit with her and while I was there I saw another one of my good friends, Pam, who has also been one of my very best customers over the years. I got to have a long and chatty visit with her too. 



Teresa's beautiful store!

Teresa surprised me with two big shopping bags as we were leaving. It was the most beautiful (and expensive) Nativity set. She said that it was a Christmas present to me from my mom. I sobbed. I am so lucky to have such loving, supportive, and generous friends! I also got to see my friend Deb twice which was so fun!! I've missed my vintage tribe!

In addition to those fun times I also had book club this month at my friend Summer's house...mask free! (We are all vaccinated.) We read The Seven and a Half Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle by Stuart Turton. A crazy trippy book and we had a great discussion! I also met with my Stake Primary Presidency at my friend Katie's house which was fun too. We are planning a big Stake Primary Missionary Activity in January. I attended two Primary Programs this month and a Temple and Priesthood Preparation Night. Bryn spoke at the Temple and Priesthood Preparation Night. She did a terrific job! 

Tyler has been busy this month. He was scheduled to go back to the office on a hybrid schedule...Tuesdays and Thursdays...after Thanksgiving but the new Omicron COVID variant has put that on hold. Now his employers are thinking that no one should come back to the office until after the holidays or even potentially until February. He got to participate in some fun activities with the youth this month. He had a big shooting activity with the YM that he had a ball at! I was nervous all day but they had a great time! He attended a combined YM/YW Family Favorites Potluck Dinner Activity with Bryn. They brought our family's favorite Broccoli Divan. He attended the musical that our high school put on this year with all the youth from our ward. Several kids from our ward/stake were performing in it. Tyler kept busy with several service projects too and helping out various members in our ward and community. This calling has been so great for him. He hates conducting and things like that but he really enjoys being more involved in the ward. 

He's also been trying to check in more with his mom. Judie has been doing okay. She got both of her cataract surgeries done so that she can drive herself now which I know is a huge relief to her and to all of us. She gets lonely but tries to stay busy. She asked me for several book recommendations. She decided to hold tight through the winter and stay in her house. She is sorting and organizing things to potentially move in the spring or summer. Joel's truck sold this month so I know that was a relief for her. Brett and Marissa went down over Thanksgiving and helped her decorate for Christmas.

Tyler and I managed to squeeze in a few fun date nights here and there. We tried a great new Indian restaurant in Post Falls that I wish I had known about years ago and a fabulous new Chinese restaurant in the valley. FINALLY!! It's been good to dedicate some time just for the two of us. It's been a much needed recharge.

We had yet another windstorm. Luckily there was no damage at our house and we didn't lose power either. My book club had to reschedule because it was too treacherous to be out driving in it. I'm so glad that we did. A big tree came down on the street where book club was to be held and another one came down on a house a few houses down from where we were going to gather. Ugh... I hate these storms.

There were some tragic events that occurred to people we love and care about. A dear family that we know lost their only daughter in a tragic car accident. Bridget was hit by a drunk driver while away at college. All of our kids have grown up together. Every one of our kids have had a Kirby kid in their grade and classes. They are the nicest kids and the nicest family. My heart is broken for them. Tyler also lost a co-worker and friend to cancer this month. :(

The school shooting in Michigan has me absolutely ENRAGED. Those families... I just don't even know what to say anymore. Children should be safe in schools. Period. What was a terrible but rare event at the Capital Building in Washington DC with politicians facing shooters is an everyday occurrence for the children in our country. More needs to be done to protect THEM!! My kids have never known one day of school without thinking that they could potentially be killed while at school. Every single one of them has learned to lockdown and hide since kindergarten. It makes me sick. In addition to this horrible shooting in Michigan...in our town our local libraries all had to close for several days due to threats. Ailey and Bryn's schools were in lockdown multiple times this month due to threats as were other area schools. I want to scream! We can't keep going on like this...

Also the dedication of the clinic that is to be named after my mother was postponed due to construction delays. I'm not sure when it will be rescheduled. It's looking like January now. So that meant that our plans to gather with Kirk and Meki and family for five days in December is off. So disappointing. We were all looking forward to being together.


Ailey and the dance team got to dance with Santa downtown! Our town had a Christmas parade...the same weekend as the tragic Christmas Parade in Wisconsin...what kind of world do we live in?! Anyway, the dance team performed and accompanied Santa Claus to River Park Square. She had a ball and it was so fun to be downtown and feeling festive.


We've seen a lot of Reilly and Hunter this month which has been really fun! We went over to their apartment one Saturday to help put together their new bed. Reilly has always loved helping Tyler do repairs around the house ever since she was a little girl. She wants a drill for Christmas and ...fun fact...she LOVES putting together IKEA furniture! Just like her Dad! Weirdos.


One Saturday Reilly came over to learn to make my version of Funeral Potatoes. This was her contribution to Hunter's family's Thanksgiving feast. They were a hit! They had never tasted such magic! LOL. We were in Portland for Thanksgiving. That will be another post. Reilly wasn't able to take time off of work so she and Hunter spent Thanksgiving with his family here in town.

We've also gotten to bum around with Bryn quite a bit. We've done a lot of shopping, Christmas shopping, and just plain having fun! One day we found the most incredible used book store! I never even knew that it existed! Tyler, Bryn, and I bought stacks of books. It is going to be a little weird next year when we are down to just one kiddo at home. We are starting early to try to get used to it by doing quite a few things just the three of us. It's been fun!

Kameron is doing well. He is *actively* teaching SEVENTEEN people in his little tiny town and area that he and his companion opened. His area doesn't even have a ward it is only a branch. They found all of these people without tracting or street contacting. God does move in mysterious ways and his work rolls forward despite the obstacles! Kam's companion finally got his visa to head to Italy which is where he was initially called to go. Kam delivered him to the mission home in Bloomington at the end of the month and then temporarily joined a trio in Albert Lea, MN until the next transfers.

We got our house all decorated for Christmas and had all three trees up by the first of the month. We winterized our yard and put the lights up on our house. It felt good to come home from our Thanksgiving trip and be all ready for Christmas!

We went to my cousin Paul's house for Thanksgiving and he requested that I make my Grandma Ellersick's Lemon Meringue Pie as one of the pies that I was bringing to Thanksgiving. I had never made it before but I got her recipe from my Aunt Bonnie and did a trial run before we went out of town. It was a success! I will be making it again at Christmas. It was so good!


Ailey also had to make a family Thanksgiving recipe for her ProStart class. They did a big Thanksgiving dinner. She made my Grandma Ellersick's Chocolate Cream Pie. It is a very tricky recipe. You cook the filling on the stove and it is super finicky but it is well worth the effort. Her pies turned out fantastic and were loved and devoured by her ProStart class. I love that these family recipes are being carried on and enjoyed by my grandma's great-grandchildren. Granny would get such a kick out of knowing that Ailey was making her recipes.

This month was chilly but with very little snow. Just how I like it. We've eaten a lot of soup and homemade bread and rolls this month. We've made my mom's chili, her tomato bisque soup, and her chicken artichoke soup. I am so happy to have my mom's recipes too! Whenever I make a recipe of my mom's or any of my three grandmas it feels like a hug from them. I feel close to them. They come alive again when I eat their food. Although seeing my mom's handwriting and her note to Reilly on the tomato bisque soup recipe brought tears to my eyes. I am so lucky to have their recipes and to have been loved by all of them.

Before we left town we sent off a Thanksgiving care package to Kameron. We also did all of our Thanksgiving baking. We were in charge of pies and rolls. We brought a few other things to eat and snack on too while we were at Paul and Whitney's. I made pecan pies, pumpkin pies, and lemon meringue pies. Ailey made the chocolate pies (since she is an expert now!) Tyler made his Grandma Kofford's famous parker house rolls. They take FOREVER but they really are the very best rolls and Thanksgiving isn't Thanksgiving without them!


Our specialty cheese from a little dairy in Wisconsin arrived too! We found this when we were in Wisconsin last fall visiting Rebecca. We made her go back and track it down so that we could order some last Christmas and this Christmas too. It is out of this world delicious. We brought some to Paul and Whitney. They loved it!



When we got back home from Portland it was time to start up the Hallmark Christmas movies! Last year during COVID quarantine and online school we watched a movie every night. That was fun! This year we will be lucky to squeeze in one or two a week but we are here for it! Even Tyler! He is always like, "I'm not going to watch it." and then he'll come in and be like, "What's happening?" LOL. This year he just sat down and watched the first one from start to finish! 


 
We started our Christmas shopping. We are hoping to be done early so that we can enjoy December! I hate madly shopping all month long. I like to get it over with and then have time to enjoy the holiday season.

Tickets for Ailey's high school Winter Concert (choir, band, and orchestra) went on sale and Ailey had to stand in line for hours to get four of them. It's insane. This concert is so popular that they have to do it on two nights and kids have to stand in line to BUY tickets for their families ($5 a ticket). Kids brought camping chairs and set them up after school to buy tickets that went on sale at 5:30 pm. It's nuts! We got tickets for Tyler, Me, Reilly, and Hunter. Bryn is going with the YM/YW and they bought tickets for the youth. So many people come who don't even have a child that is performing. They just love the Holiday concert. It's craziness!

Daylight Savings was also this month which is not my favorite but when you've got sparkly Christmas lights up it's not quite so bad!


We are definitely looking forward to CHRISTMAS!

Monday, December 06, 2021

10 Things to Tell You: November Challenge



This is another Laura Tremaine writing challenge:


1.) Who is a person in your life that you are grateful for?

Tyler...always.


2.) Describe a space or room in your home that makes you happy.

This sounds weird but right now it's the garage. It is so cozy and cheery to work out there. Tyler likes it too.


3.) Share a song or a quote that lifts you up and makes you smile.

Christmas music...bring it on. We started listening in early November. 


4.) What is something you are looking forward to?

Thanksgiving in Portland.


5.) What is something you are loving reading or listening to?

I am reading The Practical Magic Series and I love it!


6.) Write down your favorite part of the day?

Mornings. I like the time right after I get up when I do my morning routine of journaling, working on goals, reading the scriptures, and blogging while Bryn gets ready for school. 


7.) List the three best things you've eaten this week?

Funeral potatoes, weird orange jello salad, rum balls. Utah food! 


8.) What is something or someone you are proud of? 

Kameron. He is working so hard on his mission that doesn't even remotely resemble the kind of mission that he thought he would serve.


9.) Name something beautiful outside your window.

Brown's Mountain. There aren't many mountain views here in Spokane but we have one. I love it!


10.) Name something you like about yourself.

My sense of humor. It's a daily necessity. Most days I laugh until I cry at least once usually much more! We have funny kids and they know that they can get out of trouble by making me laugh. They are pros! Tyler too! LOL


11.) Name a tradition that you love and look forward to every year? 

Lefse Night! Tyler and I were just talking about it and planning it for December. 


12.) What is one of your strengths? 


This!


13.) Name someone who loves you.

Kameron. I think he is really starting to appreciate his mama! LOL


14.) Write down something that made you laugh recently.

Our family's insane Monday night video chats with Kam. This last one was particularly hilarious and we could not get it together!!




15.) What is your favorite season and why? 

Summer! Sunshine, water, boating, paddle boarding, biking, warmth, flowers, green trees, late nights, starry skies, travel, and fun!


16.) What is something you wished for years ago that you have now? 

A boat and it is glorious!


17.) Name your favorite experience in the past year. 

Hiawatha! 

It's hard to pick one but this weekend with our friends was particularly momentous!


18.) Share a time that you were brave.

Surviving the last several years: 3 heart surgeries for Tyler, 1 heart surgery for Kameron, Tyler's brain hemorrhage, losing Mom, losing Joel, COVID-19 pandemic, sending Kameron on a mission in a pandemic to a volatile city, family insanity and estrangement, and Tyler's COVID. I'm ready for better days ahead.


19.) What is something new that you've learned to do recently? 

Bake really good wheat bread.


20.) Who is a person that is always kind to you? 

My friend Marilyn. She is the most complimentary and kind person that I know. She oozes love and warmth and it's so genuine and authentic. I adore her.


21.) Name on thing that you like about your body or your appearance? 

My dimples when I smile.


22.) Who is the last person to do you a favor or help you out some how?

Tyler. He just did a big Costco and grocery run! Yay!


23.) Share a favorite memory from your childhood. 

Going to Washington DC with just my mom for a week when I was 13. We had an amazing time!! Mom never did a solo trip with any of my other siblings growing up. She and I continued to share our love of traveling together for years. We went on so many trips together...just she and I... and they are some of my most hilarious memories with her!


24.) What is one good thing about where you live? 

The lakes! Hands down!


25.) Describe a favorite smell that always makes you smile?

Water, pine trees, and coconut sun tan lotion


26.) Where is your favorite place in the world? 

On the boat with my family.


27.) Name an item or food that brings you comfort? 

Any of my favorite foods that were recipes of my mom or my Grandma Ellersick. Too many to name.


28.) Describe something weird or random that brings you joy? 

So many random things. Here are a couple: Clean sheets, lake sparkles, a Hydroflask of icy cold La Croix, Retractable Sharpies, Skinny Post-It-Notes, yellow Red Bulls, and pink skies.


29.) What is your favorite social media platform? 

Instagram. No contest. I am so over all the rest.


30.) Describe the last time you truly felt at peace.

Life has been turbulent. I've felt pockets of peace but I cannot remember the last time that I truly felt at peace.

Wednesday, December 01, 2021

One Day HH 2021

Every year Laura Tremaine (an author and podcaster who I follow) does a One Day HH Challenge. It is a one day...hour by hour... look at a day in your life. You document what one day of your life looks like right now. The goal is to capture the details. The date is always different. This year it fell on November 9th. Reilly's 25th birthday.

7:00 AM: I woke up a little late for me. I normally get up at 6:45 am on week days. The first thing that I did was send Reilly a Happy Birthday text. She is ALWAYS the first to wish everyone a Happy Birthday. I think Ailey beat me this year and was the first to wish her a happy birthday!


8:30 AM: Right before I left to drive Bryn to school, it looked like this:


SNOW! Not a fan.

9:30 AM: Every Tuesday morning at 9:30 AM I have a standing phone date with my father.

10:30 AM: I started decorating for Christmas. I used to be a purist. I liked Thanksgiving to be Thanksgiving and Christmas to be Christmas but then life got hard and weird and now I say, "Bring on Christmas!"



11:30 AM: I facetimed with my friend Rebecca who lives in Wisconsin. I forgot to get a screen shot but here is a picture of us at our friend's wedding. LOL.


12:30 PM: I had lunch. It's a weird one but I like it. I also talked to Reilly on the phone while I ate lunch.


My lunch was two corn tortillas with two melted cheese sticks drizzled with Frank's Hot Sauce and some peanuts and a lemon la croix to drink.

1:30 PM: I went walking at the park with Tyler. The snow was gone. It didn't stick and the sun came out!


2:45 PM: I'm on my lap top trying to find pictures of how I decorated last year. LOL.


3:30 PM: I picked up Bryn from school. She came home feeling crappy with cold-like symptoms. 

4:00 PM: I cancelled her 4:30 pm piano lesson and we called the doctor who did a video chat appointment with her.


Bryn talking to the doctor.

5:00 PM: Bryn went to the clinic to get a rapid COVID test. (It came back negative!) Ailey and I facetimed with Reilly. We talked to her about how her birthday had gone so far (her co-workers went all out for her!) and what Hunter had planned for her that night.


6:50 PM: (I think!) We finally had a late dinner after Bryn got back from getting her COVID test.


We had spaghetti, salad, and la croix to drink. 

7:30 PM-ish: Tyler and I were looking at houses for sale on Zillow.


8 PM: I attended a Zoom RS Meeting on Breadmaking. (Tell me you're Mormon without telling me you're Mormon!)


This was early on. We had a few more people join and this night was LIFE changing!! I am not a baker. I don't like making bread but I can make a few really good types of white bread but I have never made a good loaf of homemade wheat bread. My friend Danielle taught us how to make the best wheat bread! I've made it multiples times since then. It's a hit! I am not even a bread person and I love it hot out of the oven with some honey butter. Wow!

9:30 PM: Our house is only partially decorated for Christmas and I have zero interest in continuing to decorate tonight.


Picture from slightly earlier...living room tree up but still undecorated.

10 PM: I'm all ready for bed. Face washed, teeth brushed, vitamins taken. I'm in bed and reading this book. It's so good!



Goodnight!

Monday, November 29, 2021

Back Again

This trip everyone was able to come to Utah. Reilly and Hunter too. We all met at the airport and flew to SLC on a Thursday night on the same flight. It was the same late flight that we took the last time that we flew to Utah. By the time we landed, got two rental cars all squared away, and everyone loaded up it was around 9pm. This time we headed straight to In-N-Out for dinner. Never a bad decision. LOL. The girls wanted to try a cookie place that they had heard about on Instagram: Chip. It was pretty good. We got a box of several varieties so that we could all try them. I still prefer Crumbl. Then it was back to the hotel and bed! It felt like we never left Provo! 

The next morning was the funeral. We were up very early. Tyler picked up flowers to take to the funeral while the rest of us were still getting ready. As we drove to Moroni the sun was coming up over the mountains. It is such a beautiful sight that you don't see here in Spokane. I love it when the sun illuminates the back of a mountain and it is outlined in a fiery glow in the morning. So beautiful.

We met up with family at the church in Moroni for the family viewing. It was good to see even more family. Several more of Joel's kids and their families had arrived. Gregg was there with his girlfriend and it was wonderful to see him! Several of Tyler's cousins were there as were a lot extended family and friends. There was a big display of wonderful pictures of Joel throughout his life and many of the amazing projects that he had made over the years. We said our final goodbye to him. Hard. And then Forrest offered the family prayer. After that we moved into the chapel for the funeral service.

The chapel was packed. It's an old but very cool church with a lot of character. The setting was quite lovely for a funeral. It was also being streamed over Zoom and we heard that over thirty people watched the livestream. Kameron was one of those watching online. His Mission President gave him permission to watch. I'm so glad. My father watched online too.

It was a very nice and yet tear-filled service. Joel had planned it all himself. It was a beautiful celebration of his life and legacy. His bishop conducted. His best friend gave the opening prayer. Ailey lead the music. The first hymn he chose was Each Life that Touches Ours For Good. His youngest daughter Holly spoke first and then his son Forrest. The next hymn that he chose was, Abide With Me. After that Tyler spoke. (I'll post his talk below.) The next speaker was Joel's youngest son, Gregg. He was followed by Joel's son, Eric. The concluding speaker was Joel's bishop. The closing hymn chosen by Joel was Be Still My Soul ....no dry eyes in the room.. and then I gave the benediction.

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Tyler's remarks:

My name is Tyler Johnson and Joel is my step-dad. He is also a dearly loved father-in-law to my wife, and a much beloved and adored grandpa to our children. I want to share a few stories about him with you.

One of the funniest stories happened when my wife Kris and I had just gotten engaged and we were down visiting my mom and Joel in Moroni. Kris was looking through a photo album that they had out when suddenly she turned very pale and got a weird look on her face. I asked her what was wrong and she said, “Why does your mom have a picture of my great-great-grandpa’s grave?” I was like, “What are you talking about?” and took the photo album from her. Indeed there was a picture of the headstone of an Archibald McKinnon. Her face was absolutely panicked. We brought the photo album to my mom and Joel and nervously asked about the photo. My mom explained that it was the headstone of Joel’s great-grandpa and I told her that it was also Kris’ great-great-grandpa. As we were taking in this new strange development I looked over at Joel and he was absolutely shaking with laughter. As we stood staring at him; he said with a big grin on his face, ”Don’t worry! You’re not cousins! You can still get married!”

This McKinnon connection between my wife, our children, and Joel has been a very sweet and much bragged about connection. They are blood related and I am not. They really love to rub that in. They love that they are McKinnons and whenever we played games with Joel and divided up into teams everyone wanted to be on Joel’s team. Team McKinnon.

Another of my favorite memories of Joel occurred the summer before last. My mom and Joel were visiting us while we were staying at our family lake house. Joel and I were out on the lake in the boat with the kids and I was giving him a tour of the lake. You know Joel; he loves anything with an engine, and he was having a great time. I looked over at him and said, “Want to drive?” Joel jumped at the chance. He started out cautiously but I was like, "C'mon Joel give it some speed!" His face broke into a huge grin. He told the kids to hold on and he opened it up and sped all around the lake. He was grinning and laughing like a kid in a candy store.

Joel was a quiet man and didn’t always say a lot but his acts of love spoke volumes. He was always so willing to help with anything we needed and patiently taught me how to do many things around our house. I have fond memories of he and I working on my 4 runner together when I was in college. When visiting he always brought his tools and would ask if we needed help with anything or would just quietly repair it for us. He made so many wonderful gifts for our family: games, musical instruments, jewelry boxes, treasure chests, Christmas ornaments. You name it and Joel could make it. Joel was talented at so many things and shared those talents with those around him.

My own dad passed away about a year after my mom and Joel were married. Joel never tried to replace my dad but he was always there to give good advice, wise counsel, and help whenever it was needed. He made his own special place in my heart and in the hearts of my brother and sister. He has enriched our lives in so many ways. We are grateful for the relationships that we have had with him and his influence in our lives.

I also don’t think there could be a better or more loved Grandpa. Our daughter Reilly was the first grandchild born to my mom and Joel. And Joel was the cutest and most loving grandpa. His passing leaves a giant hole in lives of our children and in all of our lives.

I am grateful for Joel. I am grateful for his example and the influence that he has had in my life and in the lives of my family. I am grateful for the love that we share. He will be greatly missed.

Thank you.

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After the service Tyler and Brett were pallbearers and Kameron was an honorary pallbearer. There was a veteran's motorcycle club escort to the cemetery which was really cool and then military honors by the Utah National Guard and American Legion Post 31. The Brotherhood of Coal Miners did a touching graveside presentation and then Tyler dedicated the grave. The graveside service was also livestreamed which was really nice.



We brought yellow roses for everyone to place on the casket. Joel's greatest regret (his words) was that he didn't have time to build his own casket. That is 100% Joel for you! His kids did a great job of picking one out that looked like Joel could have built it.

After that there was the family luncheon and Moroni did it up right! Joel would be thrilled to know that his ward provided the very best food that any of us can ever remember having at any funeral reception before. Truly amazing! Mormons in Moroni know how to cook! We thanked the people volunteering and serving about a millions times. They did an incredible job!!



Some of the grandkids.


Some but not all of the family.

After that everyone went back to the house and spent the rest of the day and evening together. Joel wanted all of the guys to pick out a couple of ties from his tie collection. Tyler got a very cool one and picked out a nice one that we sent to Kameron. That evening everyone began to say their goodbyes. Judie's best friend, Sandra, was in town staying with her for the next week. That was really nice and put our minds a bit more at ease about leaving her. Tyler helped Brett hook up the big trailer to take up to SLC to sell and he helped Forrest with some other things that needed to be done before we left. It was hard to leave and to say goodbye to everyone. I think Joel would have been very pleased with his celebration of life. He was loved and respected by everyone that he interacted with. I know that he would have been very surprised at how many people looked up to him. He was such a humble man. 


Later that night we returned to Utah Valley with Reilly and Hunter. No surprise that Hunter, our country farm boy, loved Sanpete county! Maybe he and Reilly will end up in Utah after all. LOL. We thought about trying to meet Kirk and Meki but it just wasn't going to happen this trip. We were so drained. Reilly introduced us to one of her favorite places to eat in Utah, Cafe Zupas, where we had a late night dinner. Our girl has always loved a soup and salad place ever since she was a tiny little girl and we used to live down the street from a Souper Salad restaurant in SLC. We used to go all the time. We had been hearing about Zupas for years and we finally got to try it. We don't have them in WA but Kameron has them in Minnesota and he likes Zupas too. After we ate we hung out together at the hotel for awhile. We were able to video chat with Kameron which was really nice and we were able to process the day with him too. I am so glad that he was able to participate electronically. Finally we could barely keep our eyes open and all went to bed. Grief is exhausting. 

The next morning we tried to cram in a little bit of fun before our flight home. Reilly and Hunter were staying for another day and were planning to spend the day with Kirk and Meki. We told them goodbye the night before. We wanted to do a bit of Christmas shopping while we were in Utah. Kam wanted us to go to the Mission Belt store but unfortunately it was closed on a Saturday. Weird. The girls wanted Sundance gear so that was on our list too.

Also Tyler and I wanted to take the girls to Schmidt's Pastry Cottage for breakfast. They loved it! This place provided a lot of the food at our wedding reception. It was so fun to go there and it brought back a lot of memories of my mom and when we were planning my wedding. Those were some fun times together!!


Tyler and I have been craving those rum balls for 26 years! They are so good!


Speaking of my mom...after breakfast we headed back to Utah Valley to go up Provo Canyon to Sundance. Sundance is iconic Victoria McClellan. We all wanted new Sundance gear...hoodies, sweatshirts, hats, t-shirts. When I was in junior high I lived in Sundance clothing. Our family spent so much time there. It seemed like we were up there weekly with skiing, eating at the Tree Room, summer theatre performances, and we had a lot family friends who lived up there that we spent time with. I did A LOT of babysitting for families up at Sundance. Walking into the general store was like walking into my mom's house. It's totally her style. It smelled like her house. I instantly teared up. Ailey said to me, "I feel like I just got a hug from Grandma Vic!" Me too. I had a visceral reaction. It was crazy but also really nice.


Sundance is under major construction but it is still such a beautiful place to be and still feels like home.




We even found our family Christmas ornament for the year there. Another Mom thing. We were hoping to squeeze in a quick lunch with Kirk and Meki who were returning from the mountains but it was cutting it too close to our flight time. We grabbed another lunch from Zupas...this time to go... as we sped to the airport! We had a MUCH LESS eventful flight home! No turbulence...no crowds...plenty of empty seats on the plane! There are some definite perks when flying home on a Saturday. 

It felt great to get back to Spokane and to pick up our Beverly!! She had a wonderful time at her fancy kennel and we loved being able to watch her 24/7. That gave us great piece of mind. She did fantastic! We stopped for groceries on our way home. We planned to have Reilly's birthday celebration the next day. Things just keep rolling on and faster and faster. Before we know it Christmas will be here!

I'm so glad that we could be in Utah to celebrate Joel's life. It was interesting to see the difference in attitudes and dynamics between Tyler's family and mine. How they pulled together not apart during the loss of a significant loved one. How it brought out the best in everyone. It made everyone kinder, more tolerant, and more loving to one another. They really appreciated one another. They are eleven VERY DIFFERENT people and I REALLY stress the DIFFERENT part but there isn't contention and ugliness. Joel's death didn't remove the filter of respect and kindness from all of them. It didn't open the floodgates of corrosive toxicity. People didn't start attacking one another and airing their petty grievances. Quite the opposite. It's sad that my sisters reacted the way they did. No barriers...no filter...no boundaries...no holds barred...no respect. It was like once my mom was gone they let their toxicity rage and their true colors show and ultimately destroyed relationships with people who actually loved them. I really feel sorry for them. 

Tyler's siblings and step-siblings are going to have to help Judie sell a family farmhouse that has been in the family also for over 100 years. Quite a bit longer! There is a dang pioneer cabin on the property! I'm sure some of them would like to keep it in the family but they are all rational about it. What a wonderful change! No one is crying about selling the family legacy. They are all trying to do what is BEST for the entire family. What a novel idea! I'm sure there will be some ups and down but when there is respect and maturity rather than toxicity and pettiness I think it will be a different experience. They don't want to do anything that would mare their father/step-father's memory or their relationships. They are thrilled to have IMPROVED their relationships and contact with one another. Wow. Imagine? A month later the same love and connection and respect continues. It makes me very happy.