September 2023

 

Karson is 7 months old!

The month started out with back to school preparations. Lots of shopping and preparing to get the college kids back to college. Everyone was so busy. Kameron and Ailey worked right down to the night before we left and Bryn had volleyball games and practices before school even began. 

I took Ailey shopping by herself one day and we ran into her old high school dance team coach. It is so weird that that is all behind us. I took Bryn shopping another day. Both of those trips were for clothes and things like that not actual supplies. College kids need so much. They were so busy working that Tyler and I had to run all of their errands. 

Tyler and I found ourselves doing multiple Walmart and Target runs for the kids without the kids. We were NOT amused. Especially as they are extremely picky. While our texting thread was blowing up with their requests/demands; we texted them this picture that said...We're done! Never again. 

On the last Sunday before the kids left, Kam had to work and Tyler was in another ward, but Ailey came with us and that was fun! In the surprise of the century I shocked both girls as I stood up to bear my testimony. The last time that happened I think Bryn was in preschool. I do not enjoy bearing my testimony. I will do it when giving a talk which I do frequently but I don't love fast and testimony meeting. 

Ailey also FINALLY got her Patriarchal Blessing. Yes, it is super late. Many things thwarted this. COVID quarantine and then schedules and then forgetting about it. It was on her to schedule it and make the arrangements. I think she went into our bishop three different times for her interview and then dropped the ball with the Stake Patriarch. Our bishop was like, "Ailey, are you actually going to go this time???". She tried to get it in her BYU-Idaho ward and Kam could've gone with her but her bishop wanted her to have her parents present which I appreciate. FINALLY she got it done in the nick of time. Literally right before she left town. It was worth the wait. Plus I think she appreciates it more getting it when she was older and more mature.

Reilly brought Karson over as much as possible for the kids to spend time with him before they left town. They definitely appreciated it and hogged that baby as much as possible. LOL.

Bryn started HIGH SCHOOL!! It is such craziness to me! But here we are!

The full fit check down to her purple and white Nikes. (It's nice to have brother who works for Nike and kindly bought us all kinds of shoes with his discount!) Life was so busy that not even Tyler and I could have our traditional breakfast out on the first day of school. Kind of sad. Bryn had a great first day and is enjoying high school!

The day before the kids left for Southern Idaho... Ailey and I ran and got our nails done. Reilly and Karson came over that night for a family dinner. Reilly brought Karson's jumper.

For some reason that I can't remember someone started playing Christmas music. It put us in a such a good mood that we continued to listen to it that night. We're weird. Those kids were going to miss Karson so much!!

The next morning we left at 4 am to head to Rexburg. Tyler and I towed Ailey's car down and Kam drove his new car. Bryn had so much going on with high school and volleyball that she couldn't miss. She stayed home under Reilly's watchful eye.

We stopped for breakfast in Missoula, MT.

Before we knew it we were back in Rexburg for the kids 2nd year of college.

Ailey was living in the same apartment complex again but in a different apartment. She could move in immediately so we dropped off her stuff and got the rest of her bins out of her storage unit. Kameron had some errands to run but couldn't move into his apartment until the next day. He was moving to a town house with one of his old mission companions. After helping the kids and running errands, Tyler and I checked into our hotel in Idaho Falls. When the kids were done in Rexburg, they met us in Idaho Falls for dinner and we grabbed some frozen custard from Culvers.

Later that night Ailey drove back to Rexburg. Kameron spent the night with us at our hotel as did Ailey but she staggered in at around 1:30am. 

Kameron left very early the next morning to move into his townhouse and to claim his room. Ailey left shortly after he did. Tyler and I slept in a bit and then went to brunch at Kneaders.

Kameron met us in Idaho Falls to do a Costco run with us. We also did a Target and Walmart run for the kids as well. So I guess we weren't done! LOL.

Then we all drove back to Rexburg. Ailey wanted help setting up her room. She is rooming with her friend Olivia this year.

Here are some pics of Ailey's apartment on move-in day. She's in the townhouse style apartment again like she was last semester. It has an upstairs and a downstairs. Her room is upstairs.

Ailey and Olivia have their own bathroom which is nice.

Their room turned out cute.

Then we went over to Kameron's new complex to help him. His townhouse is much nicer than his old apartment. He used to live at the same complex as Ailey. Here are some pics of his new digs.

Last year Kam didn't want any help from us. This year we were allowed to come over and hang out. LOL. Once the kids were all moved in and their rooms set up we went to the BYU-I bookstore and then to dinner at Red Rabbit Grill.

After dinner we went back to Ailey's briefly so that Tyler could help her with her neon sign and to tell her goodbye.

Tyler and I headed back to Idaho Falls that night absolutely exhausted. Kameron had to be in Idaho Falls the next morning so we were able to see him once more before we headed out of town. On our way out of town we stopped at Reed's Dairy, a place that everyone had been telling us about, and we also grabbed some bread from Kneaders. I also stopped at a few places and found a treasure trove of Halloween stuff for my booth! Awesome! We stopped for dinner at Wah Hing in Kellogg and got back home before 10 pm!

Literally the day after dropping the kids off we were super busy mainly with church stuff. I had multiple primary presidency trainings that I had to be at and a presidency meeting. There is a new 2nd counselor in our presidency. Our ward also had our picture taken by the Stake Historian. Tyler had his picture taken as part of the high council and stake council. I will be getting mine taken with my stake primary presidency sometime soon. I guess these kinds of pictures are taken every 20 years. Kind of weird but oh well. Primary Program season has begun and I was off visiting wards throughout the stake this month.

Bryn had seminary kick-off. My friend Kata is her seminary teacher. She will be great and Bryn is excited to have her as a teacher. Here we go again with early morning seminary...ugh. It actually worked out great with Ailey because Kam drove her the first year...then it was COVID so no in-person seminary and then Ailey could drive herself. I will have the pleasure of driving Bryn for the next two years. At least they no longer have seminary on Mondays which is a nice bonus!

The day after we got home from Rexburg Reilly and Karson came over to hear about how the college drop off went and to try the weird flavored milks that we brought back from Reed's Dairy. They are famous for these. I tried several but only liked the chocolate. They are supposed to have a really good strawberry milk and a huckleberry milk but we couldn't find those flavors.

This was the cotton candy flavor.

We all thought it was meh. It didn't taste very cotton candy-like more like sweet milk.

The college kids had their first day of school. I asked for first day of school pictures. This is what I received: 

Ailey

Kam

It feels good this month to be back in a routine. Things have been so chaotic lately. It also felt really good to deep clean the house and two bedrooms after Kam and Ailey vacated. Their rooms were DISGUSTING!! Piano lessons have started up again for Bryn. Tyler and I are back at the gym although we miss seeing Ailey working there despite the fact that she rarely liked us to talk to her while she was working. 19 is precious. LOL. She still likes to be in the *know* as to what is going on at the gym in her absence. She will be working there over Christmas break in December.

The last half of the month took a nastier turn. It felt like a whole lot of hard things were crammed into two weeks. First, our water heater broke and had to be replaced. Annoying. What is even more annoying is that the State of WA doesn't allow you to replace your own water heater anymore. There are all these new laws and rules and regulations. So what would have been a $600 purchase and a free installation. Tyler knows how to do this and has done it before for us 15 years ago  has now become a $3,300 situation. Tyler also had to leave work on three different days to deal with the repairmen and the inspector. It is beyond ridiculous.

Second, Bryn's volleyball team played my niece River's volleyball team at our high school. This is super weird. I don't recall our school ever playing their school before. They are a good 2 plus hours away from us. Bryn is on the freshman team and River is on the JV team but they were both playing at the same time albeit in two different gyms at our high school. What I thought might be a nice opportunity to pop in and say hello to my niece became quite the shit show as it always does when my sisters are involved. I doubted that River's parents would be there since it was an away game. Wrong. When we pulled into the high school parking lot we saw Stacey, John, Kelley, Chris, Elle, and Elle's half sister Kendall. The whole gang. Seeing them triggers such a negative response in all of us. Reilly and Karson were there to watch Bryn play along with me and Tyler.

Since our high school has two gyms I didn't know which one Bryn was playing in. I walked into the main gym and there they all were sitting in the stands. River was busy warming up so I didn't get an opportunity to even catch her eye but the Stacey/Kelley crew were all there and glaring. Lovely. We went into the second gym to watch Bryn play. When I walked in Bryn was in tears. She had seen all of them and not one of them even said hello to her or acknowledged her. She was incredibly hurt by that. We tried to pump Bryn up for her game and told her not to worry about them. I reminded her that Karson was there and that he was worth 10 of them...no a million of them... and she smiled and stopped crying. But she took it hard and it put her off her game. Just when I think my sisters can't get more awful they absolutely do. I would never ignore any of my nieces or nephews. EVER. 

Bryn's cheering squad!

Reilly walked over to the other gym for a bit to wave at River and to watch her play. No one came to watch Bryn play even for a minute. By the time that Bryn was changed and ready to go they were nowhere to be seen. We stopped and took this picture and visited with some friends of ours.

As we headed out the door of the school there were Stacey and John talking to some parents from their school. Stacey saw us coming. I was out the door first and looked her in the eye and said hello. I opened the door and waited for Tyler, Bryn, Karson, and Reilly. I walked past Stacey a second time and waved and said hello. The girls all waved and said hello.  Stacey looked at us and gave a slight wave but said nothing. John had his back to us the entire time which is good because he is a complete jerk and also one who loves to make public scenes. There was no sign of Kelley, Chris, and the girls. Clearly they had already scurried to their cars. I'm sure that John demanded that they get the girls out of there and that we were NOT to talk to them. Obviously that is why they all came out in force. They continually surprise me with how awful they are. I guess I always want to assume that deep down somewhere in there they are decent human beings. I need to stop being surprised. They continually show me who they really are and why I want nothing to do with them. We were nice. We acknowledged them. River was acknowledged. We were open to communication. That's more than they deserve after four years of estrangement and harassment.

The two years since I've seen Stacey and the four years since I've seen John haven't been kind. They looked awful and miserable. Stacey's face was red, puffy, and looked like she had been crying. That woman cries more in public than anyone I have ever seen. She's still miserable. Still crying. Still unhappy. I guess it wasn't always about me and Kirk huh? Still with John. Maybe that is the source of her misery. If I was her I would've at least put on a show that my life was terrific while I was at the school of my estranged family. Nope. She couldn't even pretend. 

I felt so badly for Bryn. The family estrangement has hit her the hardest. Someone who is an absolute innocent. She doesn't understand how a family that once professed to love her...suddenly doesn't... and doesn't even acknowledge her in public. I hate that she had to feel all of those feelings of rejection once again. Reilly too to a certain extent. Here Reilly was with her baby who they have never seen and no one spoke to her or acknowledged Karson. I have no words of comfort anymore. Afterward we went to dinner to try to process the most recent shit show. Poor Bryn cried through most of dinner. Reilly was angry. My sisters are just so awful. Be horrible to me if you must but leave my kids alone. They are like toxic sludge that seeps under the door and in through the windows. Just when you think you are done with them they slither in...and in the most unbelievable and unexpected ways.

Shortly after that delightful family interaction... it was the 4 year anniversary of my mom's passing. It was a hard one. I was in my feelings and in tears all day. Jordin texted both me and Kirk. She also reached out to Reilly but in a way that doesn't address issues or her culpability so it is pointless. More seeping sludge. I miss my mom so much and I love her so much and yet I am still so angry that she left us in this mess. We talk to our kids all the time about not letting dysfunction creep into our family or toxicity. If there is an issue we will hash it out. We will go to counseling. We will not let our family end up this way. We've had to deal with some things. We've had to have hard conversations. We've had to have some individual counseling sessions. But this is the way to keep our family loving, supportive, and connected. 

Bryn continued to have rough week. High school and friends have been challenging. Friend groups are changing as old friends make different and not the best choices and Bryn has had to let them go. It's hard when you have been friends since kindergarten. High school always seems to be rougher on girls than boys. 

Midtown Market had its Fall Open House this month. I had to get a whole bunch of projects done and swap out all of my regular merchandise and fill my booth with Halloween and Thanksgiving items. That kept me busy.

Most of the month was filled with volleyball practices and two volleyball games a week. It has been fun watching Bryn! She is getting so good! We are enjoying being volleyball parents.

We got to see quite a bit of Karson this month which is always a treat! He is so fun and is getting so big!

Karson tried his first ice cream and he was a BIG FAN!

We got a double set of bad news at the end of the month. Tyler's Uncle Dar passed away unexpectedly. 

Tyler's Aunt Rosie and Uncle Dar were so sweet to us. When we were newlyweds and when Reilly was a baby, Dar would have Tyler come and do some *work* for him to earn extra money. Rosie and Dar were so beloved that when Reilly was three she had two little baby dolls that she named "Rosie and Dar." He will be missed.

Then I got more bad news. My friend Naomi called and told me that one of our dell friends, Matthew, had passed away. He had brain cancer and no one knew. It's incomprehensible. Matthew was such a good friend to me. He lived next door. We were friends in elementary school, Junior High, I moved away for most of high school, but then we hung out again all through college and before and after his mission right up until we started dating our future spouses. We both got married and he and his wife moved to California and we moved to Spokane. This loss really hit me hard and continues to. Dell kids don't die. We live forever. Absolutely heartbreaking.

Then there were multiple threats made to high schools in our area including Bryn's school. Sometimes I wish she was homeschooled. If she was Karson's age and I was just starting out raising children I would homeschool. They increased the police presence at her school and so we sent her. Ugh... why is school like this now?!

In happier news... Bryn started going to high school football games with her friends and has had the best time! Ailey and Kam are doing well in Rexburg. Kameron went to Utah for a his mission reunion and had a great time!

Then the last Saturday in September was the first day of General Conference and boy was I looking forward to watching. Right before Conference, the church issued a statement that neither President Nelson nor Elder Jeffery R. Holland would be at General Conference. Elder Holland was recovering from some serious health issues and President Nelson fell and injured his back. SO DISAPPOINTING! I was really looking forward to hearing from both of them. President Nelson turned 99 on 9-9-23. It is so hard to believe that he is 99 years old! My father had his birthday on the same day and turned 75.

The first day of General Conference was still good. Bryn was are little chef. She made Swedish cake and sausage for the morning session and a really good corn dip for the second session. Kameron was in Utah for Conference and Ailey was live chatting with us and sending us her notes. I love that Conference still connects us!

The rest of the month had some fun times with friends and trying to soak up all of the sunshine and warm weather before it is gone. We *almost* got in one more day of boating. We should've grabbed the day and ignored our other responsibilities!! Our garden has been amazing this summer! I've been making salsa like crazy with our tomatoes and eating them about every way possible. We still have a ton coming on. My roses are still blooming too! I love it!

Time with Karson continues to be the highlight of our weeks and month which is a good thing because September was a kick in the butt in so many ways. Here's hoping that October is a little bit lighter.