Mom's Obituary

This is a bit dreary to post on the blog but I want it to be here as a record. My mom is an amazing person and she lived an incredible life. She was an overachiever extraordinaire. How do you describe one of the most important people in your life and what they meant to you in 600 words. I did my best. This is only a partial list of her professional accomplishments...and there aren't enough words in the universe to describe what she meant to me.

Victoria Jo Ellersick McClellan King (1948-2019)

Victoria “Vicki” Jo Ellersick McClellan King, 70, of Twin Lakes, Idaho passed away Friday, September 13, 2019, in Boise, Idaho. She was born December 15, 1948 in Moscow, Idaho to Frank and Loreen Ellersick. She was the oldest of 5 siblings: Steve, John, Mike, and Marji.

Vicki grew up in Bonners Ferry, Idaho, a town she loved. She was voted most likely to succeed and graduated from Bonners Ferry High School in 1967 as the valedictorian. She received a scholarship to BYU where she earned a Bachelor of Science Degree in Nursing. She also received a Master of Science Degree from the University of Utah in Nursing Administration with a minor in Health Care Administration.

Vicki had an incredible and rewarding career in health care and hospital administration. She was a pioneer in the field of women’s health. Over her lifetime she was a public health nurse, NICU nurse, staff and charge nurse, Professor of Nursing at Ricks College in Rexburg, ID, Assistant Director of Nursing at Utah Valley Regional Medical Center and Director of Women’s and Children’s Health Services, Director of Women’s and Children’s Health Services for Baptist Health Systems in Kansas City, Missouri, Vice President/CEO of Nurse America in Overland Park, Kansas, Assistant Administrator/Vice President of St. Joseph Hospital in Houston, TX, Corporate Director of Clinical Programs and Regional Operations Officer for IHC in Salt Lake City, UT, a Vice President at Holy Family Hospital in Spokane, WA,  Adjunct Professor at Rice University and Gonzaga University, and was currently the CEO for Kaniksu Health Services in Sandpoint, Priest River, and Bonners Ferry, Idaho.

She was one of the Top 25 Women in Healthcare in Utah, named to the National Association of Women’s Health Professionals, National Association for Female Executives, Member of Utah Perinatal Association, Region 8 Perinatal Association, Who’s Who in Professional Nursing, Who’s Who of American Women. She was on the Board of Directors for: Baby Your Baby, Central Exchange, Rape Crisis Center, Community Health Center Network of Idaho, and Idaho Primary Care Association. She was passionate about helping families, women and children, veterans, and giving back to her community.

She was co-owner of a vintage home décor business with two daughters (Kristin and Stacey) called Sisters Creed. She participated in many antiques shows and vintage markets. She loved being an active and vibrant part of that community.

Professional accomplishments and accolades aside, her greatest titles were Mom and Grandma. Her greatest accomplishments were raising her five children and being the most incredible “Grandma Vic” to 13 grandchildren who love and adore her: Reilly, Kameron, Ailey, Bryn, Dane, River, Elle, Tarren, Kaiya, Kaiden, Kirin, Jaylah, and RJ.

Mom was beautiful, stylish, artistic, creative, brilliant, funny, classy, kind, loving, giving, and fun! She loved traveling, sewing, quilting, reading, driving her ski boat, being at the lake, cooking gourmet meals, celebrating ALL holidays, and hanging out with her children and grandkids. She loved to laugh and have fun.

She is survived by her five children: Kristin (Tyler) Johnson, Stacey (John) Sykes, Kelley (Chris) McKinnon, Kirkland (Meki) McClellan, and Jordin (Ramon) Hill. We will miss you every single day of our lives, Mom. You have been our rock and guiding light. We will miss your beautiful face, voice, laugh, winks, crazy antics, and your incredible hugs.

Mom and her siblings

Marji, John, Mom, Steve, and Mike

She was preceded in death by her parents and brother Mike. 

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I will miss you every single day...

I love you Mom!

September: Things That Are Getting Me Through

Slight alteration on my monthly favorite things due to present circumstances. Obviously.

1.) Beverly Our Support Animal

This puppy has gotten so much love and affection and in return she has given us so much love, peace, and emotional support. Studies show that animals can help with the grieving process. I am here to say that it is true.  Playing with, caring for, and petting animals increase the levels of the stress-reducing hormone oxytocin and decrease the production of the stress hormone cortisol. Miss Beverly has been super helpful and we all just can't get enough of her plus she humors us by sometimes wearing clothes and thinking that she is a human and not a dog.

2.) Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Sometimes you just need mindless reality tv and this is my show of choice. Watching someone other than my own siblings argue was quite soothing. Plus I have not been able to read much which has been a really crappy side effect of stress and grief.

3.) Long Walks/Work Outs

I cannot stress enough how much exercise has helped me this month. Long walks and hard workouts have been my saving grace. Tyler walks with me nearly every day (I feel like a dog needing its daily walk but it is true) and I have been able to process my emotions, feelings, frustrations, and thoughts. It is my favorite part of the day. Beyond being extremely helpful it has been necessary to keep me healthy mentally and physically.

4.) My Friends

This part makes me cry. Like beyond cry...more like ugly sob.  I cannot even express the gigantic outpouring of love that has come my way in the last two months. It is staggering and humbles me to the core. I knew that I had great friends but... wow...they are incredible! Within the tiniest fraction of time after hearing the news that my mom had passed away my kitchen was full of my friends who were organizing meals, carpool, rides to and from sports and activities, and all of our kids extracurricular activities. So many of my friends comforted our kids and made them laugh as they organized everything down to the most minute detail. Tyler and I were with my siblings...trying to cope... and these amazing friends went around me...  (I didn't even know it was happening) and had my life and my family's lives under control. So many sweet friends took the most amazing care of our family for weeks. WEEKS! They refused to stop and they wouldn't take no for an answer. I am so grateful! I cannot even say how many friends have come and cried and sat with me in my grief. We have been well cared for and well loved. It inspires me to be a better friend and a better human being in return. I am so grateful to be surrounded and buoyed up by so many wonderful people.

5.) Lounge Wear From Costco

The week after my mom died I went to Costco. I don't even know why; we had food and meals delivered for weeks but I needed something and apparently it was this lounge set. Listen... grief does not want to wear snug fitting jeans or anything with a restrictive waist band. Grief and stress need comfy stretchy pants and soft comfy shirts. I got this set in charcoal. Get a pair! You will thank me.

September 2019

So September Sucked.

My mom died.

Despite that terrible and horrible fact...and as hard as it is to believe...life went on. How dare it? But it did. School, seminary, and activities were still happening and we went on. We had some very hard days in September but we also found some pockets of joy in it as well.

Dance Team was going strong!

Homework was back and nobody was thrilled about it. This is what our kitchen table looks like nearly every afternoon.

Ailey and Bryn decided that they didn't want boring lunches anymore so they started planning creative lunches and food prepping on the weekends. Go for it.

(Let the record state that Reilly and Kam ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, fruit, and pretzels every day of their school lives and never once complained. These are some high maintenance girls. LOL.)

Reilly and I decided to schedule monthly lunch dates. There are several places we like to lunch at that are near her work. This particular day she had to take her car into the shop so we had all afternoon to shop and play. We had a great time! I am excited to have more one-on-one time with this grown up daughter of mine.

Cross Country started up for Bryn. This year she was again running for her school team and her city team. XC took the biggest hit after my mom passed away. Bryn missed a lot of practices and several meets. She missed both qualifying meets for All-City because they were happening when we had family in town and things going on for my mom's services. Brynnie was a TROOPER about all of that. She didn't complain once even though I know that she was pretty disappointed missing out on All-City. But at all the meets that she was at... she kicked butt!

XC meet for school.

XC city meet.

This year Bryn's coach was our friend Tim. He used to be our bishop before our ward divided. He was a great coach and Bryn really loved having him coach her. Tim was also Kam's seminary teacher last year. LOL.

We had all kinds of weather for Bryn's meets... sun, rain, and SNOW! Yes, it snowed in September. Ugh... if things weren't depressing enough...it freaking snowed in September for several days and it stayed around for about a week on the ground. The news said that Spokane only had two months this year without snow. July and August. HOW DEPRESSING.

We went to the Fair! This year Reilly and Kameron planned to go with their love interests so it was just the four of us. We had a lot of fun seeing all of the sights, riding the rides, and eating all of the fair food!!

Our favorite food this year was scoops of cookie dough. It was delicious in all of its flavors!

Our favorite event was a crazy Pirate High Diving Show. It was AWESOME! The show itself was super cheesy but the divers were diving from 80 ft. high platforms into a tank of water. It was pretty impressive!

Ailey loved the giant Ferris Wheel as usual. LOL.

We had a great time!!

Bryn took a field trip with her activity day girls to the temple. They got a tour of the grounds and learned a lot. My friend Amy sent me all of these beautiful pictures.

We had Back-to-School Night at the high school and Ailey's ProStart class catered the event and it was delicious! Ailey also looked super adorable in her chef's jacket.

Ailey is also in a cooking club after school. Local chefs come and teach the kids all kinds of cool cooking techniques. She LOVES IT.  Ailey wants to be a dietitian and is so into all of this stuff!! And... I finally got the mysterious recipe for the punch they serve every year. It is SO GOOD!

Ailey got new Dance Team pictures:

Ailey is on the front row...5th from the left

Look who has grown and matured! She doesn't look like the dance team's little sister any more! Ha Ha!

Kameron finally finished up all of his dental work. His tooth implant was finally completed and the  crown put on the morning of the day that my mom died. The week after Labor Day Kam went to Priest Lake with his girlfriend and her parents. He had a great time! He spent most of this month working hard, completing all of his mission paper work, and getting all of his interviews done.

The week before my mom died I found out that my BFF (from childhood and Springdell), Naomi's mom, the beloved Mrs. Winkler had passed away. Tyler and I were planning to leave the next day for Utah to attend Mrs. Winkler's funeral the day that my mom died. How very weird was that? My last conversation with my mom was talking about Mrs. Winkler and how many of our Springdell neighbors are gone now. The timing of both Naomi and I losing our moms a week a part was super strange although it did help to be going through all of this at the same time as one of my dearest friends.

The rest of the month was consumed with grief and family and plans and all that comes with something like this... it was a hard second half of September and October was brutal as well. We are now 5 days into November and things are still hard not just with losing my mom but with something else that is hard and scary that came up in October. We are hanging in there but life hasn't been easy and prayers are still very much appreciated.